The Good Ol Days

So I'm sitting here trying to recoup from the massive amount of beer I ingested at the Seahawks game yesterday. Just when I thought this evening was going to be another pseudo-jerk off fest consisting of frequent naps and chugging water, a great classic movie comes on the boob tube. Coffy was made in 1973 and stars the lovely Pam Grier. What happened to all those great 70's "exploitation" films? I remember being a young little white boy and staring at amazement as big Jim Brown whooped the snot out of drug dealers, pimps, thieves, and other no good hoodlums. Yeah they were a bit violent, but they took care of business and always protected their neighborhood so the average citizens could feel safe. They should start making more shows and movies that had the basic values that these classics had. I guess these days people would rather vote on who is America's best dance crew that sings while swapping their wives with the next top model.

This morning put the Fuck in WTF?

So we met with a printer this morning that we have been working with the past few weeks. They were going to be the main printer for the upcoming publishing venture. Well apparently they all of a sudden got offended at the content of the horror comic we are producing. They didn't get offended two weeks ago when i first gave them the samples, instead they wait until we have to meet with them at the ass crack of dawn, spend ten minutes in Comic Evolution meeting with us, just for them to say they are not interested because they pray every morning and it's basically against their religion. Really? Are you fucking kidding me? After all this bullshit you just now decided this because you have to go pray? WTF people? Sorry but that is not good business. You should not mix personal beliefs with business period.

What do you people think? Should your personal beliefs affect business?

The right and wrong ways to kill people

I kill people all the time. Yes it is always in the form of writing, but none the less I still have to think of different ways to dispatch the unfortunate victims that fall prey to the evil forces in my stories. What some people don't understand though is how hard it is to come up with a way to kill Johnny the dishwasher, or Samantha the high school virgin, or even how to kill off the the evil that is doing all the killing in the first place. Frankly, it's a big fucking pain in my ass, but god damn if i don't love it. I guess you could say it is like heroin to an addict, it hurts and life really sucks trying to find that next fix, but once you get it and you are flying everything is hunky dory.

I think right now my favorite way to kill people is to take something they have no fear of and turn it against them. This way if I choose to let them live somehow, they will no doubt have serious mental and emotional scars that will totally fuck them up; therefore creating a whole new character to play with in future stories, should the series continue. Oh, and blood! There has to be so much fucking blood and guts that Tom Savini himself would get a boner over it. So there you have it people; blood, guts, and uniqueness is the magic kool-aid formula to creative killing right? WRONG! You can have all the cool killing you want but if your story is a pile of crap, and has less substance than that crappy reality show Jersey Shore, then you might as well spin the chamber again and take another pull on the trigger.

Spend time getting to know your killer/evil character. Really delve into who they are, what makes them tick, why they do what they do, and what was the cause of it. Appreciate the lack of humanity he possesses. Also, make sure you don't follow the same recycled shit that has been done in movies over and over since the 1980's. If you are going to kill high school students, don't make the story completely about them, it's been done. Stay away from camp counselors unless they are a quick kill lead in ( more on those in later blogs). And for god sakes if you write about a babysitter slasher I will personally burn your house down.

So go forth fellow writers of horror, go forth and paint your fictional world red with the blood of the somewhat innocent :).

Story ideas are like toilet paper

Everyday it seems I get some kind of message or email through one of the various social networking sites I am a member of by a writer or artist telling me about this great idea they have for a story. While i think it is great to come up with these ideas, if you have not started any writing or art concepts you are basically wasting your time. For writers, you can have the best idea in the world, but if you have yet to even put pen to paper and at least write up a basic story outline it does not matter. A friend of mine was telling me about a certain person he came across that spent almost 2 hours trying to describe the basis of a zombie tale they were "wanting" to write. I guess they have been "wanting" to write this story for a few months now, but did not even have one actual chapter written. You can "want" to do something every day of your life, but until you actually get off your ass and start the process you are doing nothing but wasting both peoples time. Get off your ass and write something, anything, then show it and describe it to people. By not putting in the effort and actual work of getting something written you are only hurting yourself. Even if you just have a few paragraphs written, that is better than not having any kind of example of your work to show someone.

It seems that these days people are wanting things to happen "right now" and basically be handed to them with out putting in the dedication and work that it takes to complete something. So much like toilet paper, ideas don't mean anything if you dont complete the process. In the end if it goes unused, all you are left with is blank white paper and a load of shit.

I have succumbed to the dreaded blog.

So after many months of peer pressure and a 36 hour whiskey binge, I have finally succumbed to creating a blog. So much for saying "fuck conformity". Maybe I should have stayed drunk while feasting on day old chicken wings instead of giving in to the trendiness that blogs have become these days. But as a wise man once said, "sometimes you just gotta say fuck it and go with the flow". So that is what I'm doing, going with the flow per say.

This blog will mainly consist of my daily struggle (more like stress induced headache) to maintain and publish an independent horror comic; all while juggling college, a personal life, a fascination for good beer, and a love for fattening foods. If people read and enjoy this then hooray for me, if they don't like then I hope they take advice from my upcoming self help book titled "Hop, Skip, and Go Fuck Yourself".